Cameron did not say this, I do

In his own words: “Where ignorance is our master, there is no possibility of real peace.”

- Dalai Lama XIV

By Viviana Fernandez

Awareness, compassion, love and non-violence, those are some of the pillars of Tibetan Buddhism. His Holiness, the Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism, said yesterday during his 2013 visit to the United States, and  first public talk about how secular ethics could unite everyone on earth: “abortion is admissible if it will bring much suffering to the family”.

He said this after explaining that “abortion is killing”. The Dalai Lama was answering a question by Paul Root Wolpe, PhD, Director of the Emory University’s Center for Ethics during his first public talk at the Arena, in Gwinnett Center, Duluth, GA.

Doctor Wolpe presented a dilemma to his Holiness: what is there ethically to do if a child presents 100% damage?

The Dalai Lama turned to his interpreter and explained his view on abortion in such a case.

My sister, who had given me the surprise of buying a ticket for the Dalai Lama’s public talk immediately, saw my reaction. I stopped applauding. I was flabbergasted. How could these two influential figures talking about secular ethics, first of all, refer to a child, a unique soul as “100% damaged”? I guess Dr. Wolpe was referring to a severely disabled child? The Director of Emory University’s Center for Ethics was referring to a unique soul, somebody’s son or daughter, a fellow brother or sister mammal-human being as “100% damaged”.

How is “100% damage” determined? What is a 100% damaged child? How would Helen Keller answer that question? How would my 12 year old son with Down syndrome answer that question?

I can feel compassion for Dr Wolpe and the Dalai Lama’s answer. You see, before I had my son Cameron, I was also afraid of such “suffering”.  However, Cameron’s soul was stronger. He needed to be here and Down syndrome went undetected during my pregnancy in spite of getting the recommended blood tests. No amnio was done because I was not 35 years old.

Any birth or Samsara brings pain. But Cameron’s birth brought the most important Samsara in my life. He taught me how to truly love a soul unconditionally, just as he is. His birth brought me the greatest gifts taught by Tibetan Buddhism: Awareness, Compassion, and Love. In my dealing with suffering after given the news, I found the greatest treasure and gift that any human could get while on this earth. If I had found out while I was pregnant that Cameron had Down syndrome, at that stage of my life, I would have probably gone for “avoiding the suffering”.  However, it was in my acceptance of my stereotypical view and stigma associated with “damaged children” that I found the greatest love of all.

So it took a while for me to gain spiritual composure but I stayed in the arena until the very end. After all, we concluded with my sister, the Dalai Lama and Doctor Wolpe are only human. Their own experiences limit their thinking. Hopefully, they will read about my experience with Cameron. It would be significant, especially because October is National Down Syndrome Awareness Month. Almost 100% of pregnancies where Down syndrome is detected prenatally end up being terminated.

It is inevitable not to go through suffering in life. Suffering will come in many forms and shapes. I hope that before we can implement secular ethics in education we can truly grasp the sound of Grammy-nominated Tibetan flutist Nawang Khechog and his flute chant before the panel begun:

“May all be kind to each other for as long as space endures, for as long as sentient beings endure, may we care for all living beings.”

Link to another interview:
http://ireport.cnn.com/docs/DOC-1039047